/AFK (for yet another wedding)

brb as soon as I can make my brain work.  It’s always interesting to see couples decide they need a party to celebrate their coupledom.. but I can never sit through one without wondering if their solemn promises won’t turn out to have been unkeepable.

It’s nobody’s fault..

“Sometimes, days are just bad and it’s nobody’s fault. You don’t need to blame anyone–including yourself. Just head to bed early and tomorrow will be better.” ~SP&A

I still feel rediculous going back to bed at 8am though.. even if normally this is lunch time, and today is my “Saturday”..  And what about those days when it is my fault?  When the entire reasoning for it feeling rediclous and stupid is entirely my own doing?  When my own perspective and imagination created for my brain false hope and imported other people’s dreams?  I think this is a back to bed anyway.  And we’ll hash it out tomorrow..

zoooom-zooooom!

http://www.believermag.com/issues/200909/?read=article_cohen

Something I found to be an interesting read, and upon which I reflect.  As though a new car were even possible on my own horrizon.. which it’s clearly not.

The dust has settled, now what to do with all those giant terrible boy shirts… >.>

!! Here’s something that turned out pretty comfy.  I’ve redone a few of the shirt loots… from giant boy box of cotton to fun girl wear.  =^.^=

Take the orange box… You remember this thing don’t you… (First unfold it..)  Then… Layout the important bits… Flip the ‘body’ “inside out”… zigzag stich up the side so it stays stretchy… Trim the shoulder bits the way you’d like them to sit… And VOILA! And now it says nothing about unwashed masses. o.O    Luckily, it’s possible to rotate the words around to whatever part of your midsection you’d like them on, just play with it a bit before the final stiching.  If you’re trying it on a lot by yourself.. safety pins are your friend.  The shoulders can also be as full or narrow as you’d like.  I folded mine over and tacked them down so the folds cover a more supportive bra.  (not because there’s a lot to support, but because it’s comfy.)

APD Awesome sexy dress coming as soon as I can upload the photos.  (sadly the step by step may be impossible.. but I’ll give as much of a rundown of it as I can.)  =^.^=

Also… omg APD!  They’re marketing it as gta online.. but it’s so much more awesome that gta.  I know people were all googlie eyed over gta and it’s mega production team and “sandbox” which wasn’t really a sandbox but a linear story line with small side steps you could take as long doing or not as you wanted.. /eyeroll  APD actually has some interesting looking mechanics going into place that I can hardly wait to get my hands on.  I’m sure there will be more on that later too  >.>

Oh.. and to Wil,

I’m sorry if we made you uncomfortable on the escalator.  I honestly hadn’t expected to see you right there, and if I had my lifelong crush would likely have throttled my motorskills, as it has the last two pax’s…   >.<   And while our startled half hearted attempt to get your attention only rated tense shoulders and more direct texting.. We just wanted to say, Awesome lanyard! =^.^=  (looked aluminum >.> unless I’m much mistaken) Also, someday I really will get you to sign my self customized “that’s how I roll” shirt.  But not someday soon, and not while I’m wearing it.  Hope you feel better!

Dear “Girl Who Didn’t Get the Job”,

I’m sorry I’ve forgotten your name.. =/  but after hearing your story, a few very similar to them, and the responses leaning towards indy games being the wave of the future… I have a few things to say about your interview with the guy “who was worried the long hours would be too much”.

First, I’m sorry you weren’t hired.  It sucks to go out time and again, only to trudge home without getting the good handshake.  And I certainly know what that’s like.

The heart of the matter though I think is not that he was concerned you wouldn’t be able to handle the hours, or the work because you’re a girl.. but how well would you fit with the already established team.  As much as we might like to sit back and rail on the boys for having a tightly knit club with a ‘no girls allowed’ sign, I don’t think it’s always true.(And we’re guilty of it as well)  When push comes to crunch it’s how they interact as people that keep the team functioning and producing.  You will have to own up to being a very pretty girl, which is something which doesn’t normally cross into the lives of those guys.. not in person anyway. Drop the ‘hr appropriate’ responses (which they’re listening for, and hit all of us as being nothing but canned cheese.) Perhaps next interview go so far as to wear jeans (though that may be a bit too  “austin casual” for wherever you are…)  Once your foot is in the door it’s in.  It’s that first bit that’s tricky.

One of the inital bonding moments most of those sorts of interviews have is a few minutes when it’s totally ok and encouraged to geek out about whatever game(s) makes you happy.  (If you have things in common with them that they understand you’re suddenly less scary.  And not just because you’re a girl.  But as a person.)  You’ll be introduced to someone, and they might lead off with what they’ve been up to lately.. or more likely, want to know why you (as a PERSON) would want to make a game~why do you want to make a game~is it because you play something and they’ll suddenly have something in common with you? /hope

Mostly, relax.  They want to build their team of people that don’t make them nervous or add layers of drama to the goings on.. if you can keep the drama penned up in the art dept, you’re very very lucky.  Don’t go in all worried that they won’t like you, or they won’t.  Even awesome interviews where you hit it off with most of your perspective new team.. you might remind one of them about someone they used to not like working for. And yes, that can be the lynch pin.  And this is not limited to the games world.

Stop leaning on the “it’s because I’m a girl” crutch, stop being afraid, go out there and make something fun dammit.  (We just won’t mention that the xbox controllers in the break room are the smaller ones, and eventually no one will care.)

I really am sorry they told you no, but don’t let it stop you.  Just make sure you enjoy working on whatever you find yourself building.

PAX = Done! And (I am) Swine Flu Free! \o/

As the list of outbound flights of those unlucky enough to come in close contact with our little h1n1 grows… I think yeah… Purrell as a sponser wouldn’t be terrible… darnright clever even. (though they’d still have to use the stuff.)  =^.^=  And while we’re at it >.> we’ve already got gamer razors… where’s our gamer deoderant?  Come on people at axe.. if there’s one challenge fit for the travel size bo combatant it’s the line rides at a gamer gathering.  (it drove me out of line twice… and hailing from my nerd filled call center >.> I can safely say, that funk took work, dedication, planning, and careful cultivation.)  You don’t even need to tell us it’s not a new smell.  Just take whatever is selling iffy right now, slap a night elf chick riding a space ship on it, and drop it in the swag bag.  =)

PAX!!!! \o/

AFK while in Seattle.  Crumpets, good walks, coffee on every corner (sometimes x5), and nerds as far as the eye can see!  bbl with new t-shirts and more musings on the whole “girls in gaming” phenominominom. inom. Why are people so surprised? Is it really just safer for the “boys” to assume that everyone they meet on teh interwebz is a fat old doood? Is this something that needs addressed as a seperate issue? Or can we just go out and do our own thing like we always have and maybe order those slightly smaller xbox controllers for the office… >.>

Superhero

rofl..  I will say that if the Champions people run another UI pass, I may be able to play past the character creation without throwing my keyboard out the window.. and if they’re looking to release on the xbox they’ll desperately need to. I can see where they were trying to go with it though.. the whole interaction list set up thing has been used successfully other places. I just think if your basic UI is trickier to get into than Eve.. you need to redo it.

Naked Invention

I’m only rarely struck by how.. moving something looks.  Jason has always managed to stir up thoughts though, even when he was just making music and monkeying around in the woods.  I will say only what I’ve always said Mr. Dulin.. More please. =^.^= So, what have you made today?

~edit~

as it turns out what I have usually said is “OMAIGOSHMOOOAR!!!1!!one!!! – p.s. send MOOAAR soon. =^.
^=”  But I’ve mellowed in my old age.